Numbers

NUMBERS

There are all sorts of numbers in our diabetes world.

Blood sugar numbers, carb counts, carb ratios, bolus and basal numbers, etc.

But there are other numbers related to diabetes as well.

Here are a few numbers that personally represent my diabetes life.

12,045: Number of days I’ve lived with "the betes,now"

Number of injections given: This is tricky because now I’m on the pump and when I was on multiple daily injections, the rates varied. So, I need to get back to you on this one.

1418: Number of infusion sites I’ve used in my pump wearing life: Here’s how the breakdown - And please keep in mind I was a Litt major in college.

I’ve been on an insulin pump for 8 years. There are 365 days a year. 8 X’s 365 = 2,920 days.

Divide 2,920 by 2.5 (2.5 being the average number of days I wear an infusion set, give or take a few days =1168.

Take into account the number of unexpected doorknob infusion set extractions, which I’m guesstamating to be somewhere around 100.

ADD (thanks Val) 100 + 1168, for a new grand total of 1268.

Remember to take into account the number of infusion that was actually on a dead spot. Because of the “dead” factor, those sites absolutely refused to absorb insulin and needed to be replaced. Let’s say…100 + 1268 = 1368.

Now, add the number of infusion sets that for some reason didn’t stick properly due to inadvertently folding sticky part of infusion set and had to be replaced with in 1 day. Lets say…... Lets say…. 50. Final Grand Total: 1418.

792: number of insulin bottles used in the last 33 years. This not number doesn't include the the insulin bottles that broke and had to be replaced - Because I have no idea what that number actually is. But I do know that the broken insulin bottle phenomenon usually occurs when you don't have another bottle of insulin on hand.

300: Estimated number of times someone has asked me if my insulin pump was a beeper.

3: number of times I’ve worn my insulin pump in my bra. Seriously, I don’t have the boob ratio to get away with that.

4: Number of times I’ve gotten my infusion set caught on my car’s emergency break.

2: number of times in 8 years I went to work and forgot my insulin pump at home.

1: Number of times I left my insulin pump at my chiropractors office and went home without it after an adjustment.

10ish: Number of times I forgot my meter at home and didn’t have a spare.

2: Number of times my meter case was stolen because some thief thought it was a wallet.

I’m not kidding. It happen once at a bar when my hand bag and the contents spilled out, and once at a coffee shop on Walnut Street where some dude took swiped it off the table I was sitting at. But the joke was on them!!

52: Number of Flavors Ben & Jerry’s currently available for purchase.

7: Number of pounds I’d like to loose.

????????: Number of carbs I’ve bolused for in my diabetes: OK, there’s no fucking way I can figure that number out! NEXT configuration

35 – 65: Number of carbs in a boutique cupcake. Carb configurations are based on the size and icing ratio of said cupcake.

IN THE THOUSANDS: Number of times I’ve uttered the term “ I’M HIGH” in public when referring to my blood sugar.

IN THE THOUSANDS: Number of times I’ve reached Blood Sugar Nirvana

IN THE MILLIONS : Number of Diabetes Police in the world

6,000,000,000: Number of times I’ve had to say: Yes, I’m allowed to eat that.

ENOUGH TO PURCHASE A GINORMOUS BEACH HOUSE & NOT HAVE A MORTGAGE: MONEY spent on living a diabetes life.

OK, I can’t do anymore Diabetes Math, because my head really hurts.

Any numbers you’d like to add?