The temps are warm, Billboards on the island bridge are ripped and crashed and left floating in the marshes, yet they look like a modern sculptures rising up like a Phoenix from the ashes.
The sun shines blindingly bright, and the colors are more intense now that the gray is gone. Even the downed trees have a certain beauty in their chaos.
The same can be said for what's going on with my mom.
When I finally made it through the traffic, off the expressway & back to the hospital around 12:30 yesterday afternoon yesterday, my mother's eyes were open and she was cognisant and attempting to talk back to me - except she couldn't because she still was connected to the vent.
The Doctors were shocked that she was no longer in septic shock.
And last night when I left, they'd given her pain meds and she was snoring through her breathing & feeding tubes.
If all goes well today, they will remove her breathing tube.
Yesterday afternoon I held her hand, sang Rhianna's "Umbrella" song very badly (because for some reason, my mom likes Rhianna,) and my voice - which only a mother could love.
But mostly I talked about how amazing she's doing, and I'd sing bits of her favorite song - The very same song she'd sing to me as little girl while she was brushing my hair:
When I was just a little girl,
I asked my mother, 'What will I be?
'Will I be pretty?
'Will I be rich?'
Here's what she said to me:
'Que sera, sera,
'Whatever will be, will be;
'The future's not ours to see.
'Que sera, sera,
'What will be, will be.
When I grew up and fell in love,
I asked my sweetheart, 'What lies ahead?
'Will we have rainbows
'day after day?'
Here's what my sweetheart said:
'Que sera, sera,
'Whatever will be, will be;
'The future's not ours to see.
'Que sera, sera,
'What will be, will be.'
Now I have children of my own,
They ask their mother, 'What will I be?
'Will I be handsome?
'Will I be rich?'
I tell them tenderly:
'Que sera, sera,
'Whatever will be, will be;
'The future's not ours to see.
'Que sera, sera,
'What will be, will be.'
(finale)QUE SERA SER
I'm on my way to the hospital now, and while I still believe she has more rounds to fight and that there is more work to be done - Your continued positive thoughts, vibes, and prayers are indeed working! My hope still floats, and the glass is remains half full.
If today is a better day than yesterday - Then it will be a wonderful day.
And I thank you all from the bottom of my imperfect pancreas for how you've ALL been there for us!
I don't know what we would do without you!
UPDATE: They have removed her vent. She's on a ang tube for meds and oxygen. Her vocal cords are very bruised and she has thrush. She's still on antibiotics & they put her on some morphine for pain this afternoon after they removed the vent and put the ang tube through her nose, so she's very groggy and very sleepy. . She's having a belly catscan today at 2:30.
Belly catscan was fine, blood gasses are normal, she told me to hurry up and get home because I had a long drive and physical therapy starts tomorrow.
Today was a good day!
