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Thankful For The DOC And Pulling Myself Up By My BootStraps.....

Thankful For The DOC And Pulling Myself Up By My BootStraps.....
So it's been a rough ride these past 6 weeks and I have so much to come to grips with.
I miss my mother terribly and the the loss I'm feeling is indescribable.
I feel like I'm in some weird parallel universe and I don't like it one bit! I just want my mother back and my life to go back to normal, because this "new normal" is breaking my heart.
And I'm having a real problem putting how I feel into words - And when I sit at the computer to write about my feelings on the subject - I draw a blank.

But I can tell you that I'm so incredibly thankful & grateful for the Diabetes On-Line community! Without your love and support, I don't know what I'd do!!

The cards, emails, direct messages, cupcakes (Thank you Stacey Divone!) phone calls/voicemail and being there in IRL (Penny!!) have kept and continue to keep me going.

I can also tell you that I promised my mother I would be OK, and no matter what happens - I will be.

Mom and I were always honest with one another and I knew that if she thought I wouldn't be OK, she'd hang on. After her heart stopped and she coded twice, she never woke up and we were told she never would. She was on a ventilator and and starting to suffer.

So for her to hang on out of shear worry wasn't something I wanted for her. So I told her I'd be OK, and that if she wanted to go "home" to see see Daddy, Debbie, her parents, brother and sister and nephews, I'd be OK and to give them all kisses for me.

I loved my mother SO MUCH. She was in her mid 40's when I was born and our bond was so damn strong. She was my mother, friend and protector all in one - And I was her daughter, friend and protector all and one and together we were a force of nature!

Mom supported, was proud and accepted who I was - and who I wasn't and loved me no matter what! We laughed and we had moments when we fought fiercely, but the fights never lasted long, we never held grudges and we always told one another how much we loved each other.

Her house is now quiet without her laughter and sparkling personality, as is my heart.

But I'm happy that my mother lived independently up until the time she went into the hospital. She was always moving and doing and her social life was busier than mine!

She drove herself around in a 20 year old champagne colored caddy and everyone who came in contact with her LOVED her. Both her landscaper and mailman are heart broken by her death - I kid you not.

As far me, I've taken my mother's lifelong advice and have attempted to pick myself up by my bootstraps - even though I'm not so surefooted yet. I'm back working, back blogging and have many changes ahead of me in the next year. And all the change that's currently happening and will continue to happen is really scary.

My next post will be diabetes related, but from time to time, I'm going to write about my mom and I hope you'll all understand why. LOVE & THANKS!!!
Posted by Mr. Boy at 10.33, Add Comment
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Dear Diabetes - I GOT YOUR MESSAGE!

Dear Diabetes - I GOT YOUR MESSAGE!

Dear Diabetes:

I’m STARVING

And… well, It’s all your fault. Seriously my stomach is growling and I have a headache.

Yours truly only had coffee for breakfast this morning thanks to waking up with a blood sugar of 290, caused by middle of the night low at 3 a.m. of 50.

OK- I realize that I’m responsible just as much as much as you are regarding the low BG, we ARE a team after all.

And I TOTALLY understand that you were nudging me with the 3am low to:

A. Wake me up and treat the 3 a.m. low

B. Make me realize that I need to take good look at early a.m basal rates and consider an adjustment.

C. You reminded me yet again, that like most "well oiled machines," you need tweaking every once in a while.

Done and done my friend! My iphone alarm is currently set for 12 a.m. and 3 a.m. basal rate blood sugar tests.

But next time D, time how about just putting the volume to 10, instead of turning it all the way up to 11.

Yes, I referenced (though be it poorly) Spinal Tap- I know how much you love that movie!

LOOK, I totally appreciate and am forever grateful that you woke me up for the low. THANK-YOU, THANK-YOU, THANK-YOU! From the bottom of my imperfect pancreas for the cold sweat and pounding heart low blood sugar alarm.

Thank you for allowing me to wake up and have the presence of mind to treat it, even if I over treated it this time.

It’s just, well… it made working this morning a bit of a drag – from the second my iphone alarm clock rang at 6:30 am. It took a ridiculous amount of time to peel myself out from under the covers and get ready for work.

And YES, paperwork was accomplished and my calendar IS coming finally coming together- but it took you (and me) a good bit to feel like the caffeine was ACTUALLY kicking in.

Current #Bgnow is 144, which means lunch is a go. Which is good thing- because like I said- I’M STARVING.

Let’s continue to work on our “Communication Skills D"

Like it or not, we are team and we have to work as one, 24X7, 365 days a year.

I will even go with Mediterranean Salad for lunch- because I know that particular salad works well regarding keeping the blood sugar study.

Talk to you in a few hours, when it’s time to check our post lunch blood sugar numbers!

Peace ~

Kelly K

Posted by Mr. Boy at 09.40, Add Comment
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Out, Damned Dead Spot!!

Out, Damned Dead Spot!!
Well, it's official - I have a dead spot on my belly. Well, maybe not dead like in "Night Of The Living Dead," the infusion site area isn't all zombiefied and ghoulish- but how bout that for a visual!?
I'll say this though, my newest dead spot it definitely in a state of infusion site coma /purgatory that leaves the absorption rate on the lower left side of my abdomen & slightly below my rib cage "less absorby" than other areas on my person.

At first I thought I was it was just the seasonal high blood sugars, which I (along with almost all of the DOC,) have been experiencing. But after testing the same area twice in a 10 day period, I came to the realization that I had to increase my temporary basal rate to compensate for the lack of insulin absorption. I ended up changing the site early both times.

The fact that I've lost another area of pump prime real estate (say that three times fast!) is a bummer because let's face it, there aren't many locations my infusion sites can call home.

Pump or MDI, dead spots are a real problem. What happens when I (we) run out of real estate?
What then Diabetesalicious reader???

Seriously, after 30 some years of living with diabetes, my pickings are slim and I'm starting to worry. Sratch that, I'm not starting to worry, I"M WORRIED.

For now I'm going to leave the dead spot alone and send it some positive absorption vibes, and with any luck, the area will regenerate and become insulin friendly once again.

But I still worry.

What are your thoughts about the dreaded dead spots and what do you do about them?
Posted by Mr. Boy at 08.04, Add Comment
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The Search for Safe Medicine

The Search for Safe Medicine
The objective of this blog is to raise issues of patient safety, and the urgent need for people to identify safer medical therapies when they become ill.

This blog discusses medical issues, and contrasts and compares what different medical therapies can offer people when they are sick. In doing so it concerns itself with two main strands of discussion.

     1. The evidence that conventional medicine is dangerous, and in fact, more dangerous than most people recognise, and certainly more dangerous that we are told by the conventional medical establishment, and the mainstream media.

     2. The comparative safety of homeopathy, and other traditional therapies that work with, or alongside the body, rather than in opposition to it.

If national governments, national health services, the Big Pharmaceutical companies, and the mainstream media were prepared to publish the truth about conventional medicine this blog would be entirely unnecessary.

As it is, the 'official' line is quite consistent in what it tells us: that conventional drugs and vaccines are entirely safe, and are winning the battle against disease.

This is entirely untrue. In fact, the conventional medical system is failing, and failing badly. If you would like to discover why, follow this blog so that you are routinely informed about new blogs as they appear.

For a more detailed and comprehensive consideration of these matters, see my free e-book by clicking here: The Failure of Conventional Medicine.
Posted by Mr. Boy at 02.14, Add Comment
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